Faded Beauty. ANGKOR WHAAATTTT!?!?

Train of thought.... boarding now....  

Angkor Wat, or as the local aussie bar refers to it, "angkor WHAT?"

A wonder of the world, I loved it, briefly, and moved on.  I am equally in awe of the lack of appreciation I managed to show, the lack of reverence, as I am the actual feat of angkor wat itself and the surrounding temples.   I spent an amazing and unforgettable day there.  As unforgettable as S-21, the torture facility in Phnom Penh and forever they have been linked together as opposite ends of the spectrum of Cambodian history.  With all the force S-21 horrified me and left me shaking and weak, disenfranchised with humans as a whole, Angkor left me impressed and inspired.  

This place was a heaven for me.  One part Indiana Jones Hidden Temple, one part hot Tomb Raider, Angkor is THE inspiration for generations of fantasy creators, movie or otherwise.  Re-discovered in the late 1800s, I feel like that same explorer as we walk through the opening gate just before sunrise, engraved with a giant head like something out of "temple of the hidden monkey".  Beyond the gate and wall there is a perfectly symmetrical courtyard, two mirrored lakes flank a walk way which lead to THE temple.  Five spires, only three visible at a time, create a circular symmetry.  And so much to climb on, the main tower in the middle is blocked off, but I scramble on the temples surrounding and I feel like screaming with the pure joy and triumph as the sun rises above the clouds and creates a scene more perfect than any picture could do justice.  

This place was ravaged during the Khmer Rouge domination, they raped this place and it even still shines.  We visit all the surrounding temples, each with its own beauty, one is over grown with trees sprouting from the ruins as if its beauty alone it sustaining these sky-scraping trees, another is a mountain of construction, over four stories of solid rock architecture.  Why then, given all of this persevering wonder was I unable to appreciate it for what it was?

I really dont know, I felt very removed while trekking across stone walls engraved with battle scenes older than anyone knows.  I look back and think maybe it was because I knew what I had to go back to.  I had to go back to a class on the more recent history of Cambodia, a far more bloody and nasty story.  I regret this, I couldnt throw myself at Angkor as I should have.  But the people of Cambodia have grieved and moved on, why cant I?  

I have always expected to be able to change the world through my work, my current helplessness is getting to me, why is it that all I am doing here is moot court and a test?  Albeit it is a class, meant to educate, but we cant be thrown into a situation like this with no access to true justice beyond giving beggars food... what the hell?  This wont stand with me for long, and if anything, this experience (-which is about to come to a head-) has taught me not to shy away from the responsibility, the duty to not be negligent with that which I have been gifted, an education.   What is an education about the history of the people who dont have a place in the history books without any form of immediate reconciliation?  I feel responsible for my western cultures actions, dont forget, the genocidal Khmer Rouge was a US ally.  Duty, breach causation, damage, Cambodia (among many others) should file a class action tort claim on the rest of the world.  A bad joke sure, but seriously, what the hell else can they do?  Warren Klein, here to learn, learning to help.  With no place assured on the world stage, someone must speak and demand accountability for those who for 60 years have acted with impunity as world police.  My brain jumps to an economic reconciliation package, but then again I am rambling......

My train of thought, last stop here.  Bed time.  You dont have to go home, but you need to get the hell out of here.  

Written but not read by warren klein.